POOP!

Man, my brother and I poop A LOT! We're totally full of crap. Seriously, the backyard is starting to look like a mine field! Poop is weird too. Sometimes it's hard, but sometimes it's really runny and has no shape. It's always brown, no matter what you eat. But sometimes it will have little pieces from my toys that I accidentally swallow. I'll just be chewing on my rope toy, and before I know it half of the rope is gone. I get a little worried, like,"WHY'S THE ROPE GONE?!?" Then I just wait a few hours and PLOP, right there, in the doody, the pieces of rope that were missing. But don't worry, I never reuse the rope, that would be disgusting. What's also weird? Humans don't poop where dogs poop. There are these huge water bowls upstairs that have these lids. Humans sit on them and go poop...so strange!!! They have this white paper stuff next to the toilet, not really sure what that's for, but then there's this little handle that they pull, it makes a loud, scary sound, and the poop disappears!!!! I wonder if they make water bowls like that for dogs. It's a really smart idea because it'd have a dual purpose, you could drink out of it and poop in it! Couldn't do that right now, my water bowl doesn't have a handle to make the poop disappear. My mom would probably love it if I had a water bowl to poop in. That's probably what she's thinking about as she picks up all the poop in the backyard this morning. Trust me, there was a lot of it. There were like three shopping bags full of poop. I really hope Mom doesn't recycle those bags because that would be a little gross. Humans are so great...our mom is probably one of the best humans there is. I wish I could tell her that, because she really looks unhappy when she's picking up the poop. Maybe I could teach myself to use the water bowls upstairs!!! I can't be that hard. I learned how to balance a treat on my nose in like a couple of days, and this is basically the same thing! Hmmm, but how would I get on the water bowl, it's not very big, and I usually require a lot of room to complete my business...I'm a walking pooper. Well, guess I better get cracking on my new invention, the walking-poop-water-bowl! That can wait until I get done running around and playing with Sippi, though. Then I'll need to take a good nap. Then I'll chew on my toys for a spell. Then it'll be time for a snack. Then another nap...it's good for my digestion. Then I'll probably have to go potty, and there's lots of barking to do at the strange humans that are building some kind of human thing next door. Whew! Lots to do today!
Woof woof and cheers!
Baerli